advice | Pat Bean's blog

Posts Tagged ‘advice’

Some Pretty Good Suggestions

Posted in Journeys, Nature, tagged advice, Suggestions on September 6, 2016| 2 Comments »

I suggest you stop what you;re doing whent a butterfly is nearby ... and simply enjoy watching it. -- Photo by Pat Bean

I suggest you stop what you;re doing when a butterfly is nearby … and simply enjoy watching it. — Photo by Pat Bean

“When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.” — Erma Bombeck

But I Don’t Give Advice

When my children finally reached adulthood, I tried not to give them too much advice. I had made too many mistakes in my own life to think any advice I gave would be good. Well, all except for my youngest daughter. I never had any qualms about giving her advice because I knew she would never follow it.

And alqys take thepath less traveled ... although I traveled this one fairly quickly, and loudly, when at the halfway point I came across a sign that said Beware of Bears. -- Photo by Pat Bean

And I suggest you take the path less traveled … although I traveled this one fairly quickly, and loudly, when at the halfway point I came across a sign that said: Beware of Bears. — Photo by Pat Bean

She was simply that kind of child.

Nowadays, with three teenage boys in her home, she’s always asking me for advice on how to handle things when the boys do something she would prefer they not do.

I can’t help but laugh and say, “I didn’t have the answers when you were doing that. What makes you think I’m any wiser today?”

Meanwhile I came across some suggestions to myself that I had written down in my journal back in 2004 when I was newly retired. I think they’re still pretty wise, so I’ll share them:

Read the instructions …

Shut up and do something about it …

Relish the moment …

Add more color …

Decide what you want and give it to yourself …

Ask an old person to tell you a story …

Think before you …

Perhaps you have a few suggestions of your own that you would like to add to the list.

Bean Pat: Strasbourg http://tinyurl.com/zueuxhu For the armchair traveler

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Good Advice or Bad Advice?

Posted in Dogs, Journeys, Nature, Writing, tagged advice, Chuck Wendid, nature, pat bean on February 4, 2014| 8 Comments »

Most people who ask for advice from others have already resolved to act as it pleases them.” – Khalil Gibran.

Of course when I hiked the benches of Mount Ogden in Utah, I wasn't exactly along. I always had Peaches or Maggie with me. Peaches would have torn the limbs off of anyone who tried to harm me. But, Maggie, who is shown here, would have been hiding behind me for protection. -- Photo by Pat Bean

Of course when I hiked the benches of Mount Ogden in Utah, I wasn’t exactly alone. I always had Peaches or Maggie with me. Peaches would have torn the limbs off of anyone who tried to harm me. But, Maggie, who is shown here, would have been hiding behind me for protection. — Photo by Pat Bean

It All Depends

This is a photo my daughter shot while riding alone in the desert. — Photo by T.C. Ornelas

I’m not a fan of giving advice – or getting it for that matter. I cringe when all but my youngest daughter asks me for advice, especially in areas in which I’ve made mistakes – and that covers a about a jillion areas.

And the only reason I don’t mind giving my youngest daughter with neck problems advice is that I know she won’t take it. I guess she takes after me. I can’t think of hardly any advice given me that I didn’t distain in favor of the hard knocks of experiencing things for myself.

Besides, over the years, I’ve learned that sometimes good-intentioned advice is not in my best interests. The best example is the frequent advice I was always getting not to hike the benches around Ogden alone.

And this is one of the coyotes that have followed her. — Photo by T.C. Ornelas

If I had followed that advice, heeding the fears of others, I would have deprived myself of some of the most soul-filling moments of my 25 years of living in Northern Utah. Knowing this is what keeps me from telling my youngest daughter not to ride her horse along in the desert, where coyotes trail her path.

For some of us, having our alone time in nature, is absolutely necessary for maintaining sanity. It was for me when I had daily newspaper deadlines to meet. And my daughter is a working mother, who raised three daughters and is now raising three boys, including two teenagers among them. Talk about needing to hold onto saneness.

I also didn’t follow the advice of all the financial gurus who told me how much money I needed to retire. Instead I’ve spent the past 10 years, nine of them traveling – alone – full-time in an RV across this vast country, perfecting ways to get by on much less than the gurus claimed I needed.

Recently, I’ve been checking out advice for getting my book, Travels with Maggie, published. Advice for this seems to be just about around every corner — and in the tradition of writing advice, the various suggestions are often contradictory.

But this morning, I read the best piece of publishing advice I have come across since I started researching the issue. It was offered by Chuck Wendig, author of “Kiss –Ass Writer.” The first step, said Chuck, is “write something great.”

I don’t think I’ve ever heard a better piece of advice, or one that I will try harder to follow.

The Wondering-Wanderer’s blog pick of the day.

Bean’s Pat: Winter’s Heartbeat http://tinyurl.com/nxuqj55 This blog might actually make you not want to chase away the cold.

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Bull Snot!

Posted in Journeys, Nature, Travel, Writing, tagged advice, pat bean, retirement on April 27, 2013| 16 Comments »

I've seen the Pacific from Maine' coast ... -- Photo by Pat Bean

I’ve seen the Atlantic Ocean from Maine’ coast … — Photo by Pat Bean

“I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.” Oscar Wilde

“A word to the wise ain’t necessary – it’s the stupid ones that need the advice.” Bill Cosby

You Shouldn’t Always Follow Advice

I’ve wanted to use the phrase bull snot for a long time. I translate it as meaning: “Ha, you’re wrong,” but more dramatically.

And the Pacific Ocean from California’s coast …

I came across the perfect instance this morning when I read an article called “The Biggest Blunders New Retirees Make” from U.S. News and World Report. I name the source so you’ll know it wasn’t written by some fly-by-the-seat-of-his/her-anus.

If I had followed most of the advice in the article, I wouldn’t have had the awesome life I lived for the past nine years.

Don’t jump the gun into a new life, the writer recommended. I jumped. Bought an RV two weeks before I retired, quickly sold my home and took off for the road. It was something I had dreamed of doing almost my whole life and I wasn’t about to delay it one more minute.

I also didn’t take the article’s advice to wait until I had accumulated more money than I could have in another lifetime, and by ignoring the advice not to spend too much on travel and hobbies.

The only financial advice I had followed was that I did make sure I had adequate health insurance before I took off.

My financial solution to limited money was to downscale my wants and needs, and come up with the least amount I would eventually need to live on when I quit the road, and then try to make the rest last for as long as I could.

And now I’m watching the desert bloom — because I didn’t follow anyone’s advice. — Photo by Pat Bean

Having recently traded in my nine-year road life (well I still have my RV, and a few trips left in me) for a small apartment in a nice area of Tucson, I think I succeeded in that.

But then I broke yet another piece of advice in doing it. Don’t move where you don’t know anyone, the article said.

Except for one daughter, who lives on the other side of town, I didn’t know anyone else in Tucson when I settled here in January. I use the past tense in saying that because I’ve already made friends, and I find starting my whole life anew energizing and fun.

But then I’m me and not you. The article’s advice might actually be good for some of you. Just don’t lose your dreams over the wrong advice.